Five Ways to Prioritize Your Mental Health, Right Now.
Here are five ways to put your mental health first, because remember - you deserve it!
Life is tough - there are no two ways about it. Whether or not we plan for difficult moments or challenges to come our way, those moments arrive. When they do, our mental health often suffers, because we are in survival mode. The "hard" in life will always be there, but it is for that reason that we need to ensure that we prioritize our mental health. That way, when difficulty comes knocking, we have a stronger baseline of mental and emotional stability to face it head-on.
Now, this doesn't have to be all doomy and gloomy (not the saying, but I like it better). Mental health has such a negative connotation associated with it. Like, hello, mental health is talking about HEALTH! Isn't health a wonderful, beautiful thing?! Why should our conversations around being healthy (in any and all aspects of life) be stigmatized?
Talking about mental health can be uplifting, bright, and cheerful. It can also be serious, tough, and even a little scary. That's okay - it's all okay and it's all welcomed here. My goal here is simply to offer a few ways in which we can focus on recharging, recovering, and rewarding ourselves by prioritizing our health and well-being. The five "techniques" below aren't grand ideas, they are simply tools to have in our toolbox that we can utilize at any given time.
1. In the words of Dolly Parton, "Find out who you are, and do it on purpose."
Who doesn't love some words of wisdom from Dolly? In all seriousness, though, learning about ourselves is an incredibly powerful way to support our mental health. Each of us lives within a body, and that body is the mechanism through which we physically exist in the world. Our body consists of trillions of cells, bone, organs, blood - you know, all that cool stuff. The extra cool part is that there is and will ever only be just one of each of us.
Each of us is unique. The Merriam-Webster definition of unique is, "being the only one; being without a like or equal." That means that it is our responsibility to get to know ourselves, to show ourselves to the world. In fact, only we ourselves are capable of learning who we are on such an intimate level. Our uniqueness is our superpower.
How does this connect to mental health? Well, I am of the belief that knowledge is power, and in this case, that knowledge can grant us a deeper understanding of who we are. When we come to better understand ourselves, it is easier to appreciate and wholly accept ourselves for all of the greatness that we are.
So, what are some ways to better get to know ourselves? There are biggish ways and some smaller moves, too. Of course, therapy is always a strong choice (in my opinion, at least). Therapy allows us a safe and confidential space for self-reflection and growth. We can learn about what makes us anxious or excited, what our strengths are, and how we can find an internal balance.
Perhaps a more fun and less commitment-oriented activity is something like astrology! This isn't for everyone, and that's totally fair. For me, I have a kind of "take the best, and leave the rest" approach to astrology.
Our astrology chart (also called a birth or natal chart) is a snapshot of the sky at the exact time and from the location that we were born. This unique (see what I did there :)) chart can give us insight into our personality, our strengths, our desires, etc. Again, if it doesn't resonate with you, no big. I just like the idea of the universe sharing its knowledge with me and helping explain why I am ... who I am?
A final thought on our own self-education: ask other people in your life to share some of their favorite memories of you together. Not only will you get to hear how wonderful you are (because you ARE!), but it's a lovely reminder that we have great people in our life who are cheering us on.
2. Start journaling.
Again, this may or may not be your cup of tea. For some of us, journaling can be a very healthy way for us to express ourselves. Putting our thoughts, worries, hopes, and fears down on paper can help us find a bit of distance from them. There's a lot going on in our head at any given moment, and during times of heightened stress, our brain can feel like a cacophony of chaos.
Through journaling, we are actively releasing some of our emotions that need a bit of breathing room. Even just a few minutes of writing - whether in a physical journal, on a phone, computer, etc. - can help release some of that stuck energy within us.
You don't need a specific topic to write about. The thing is, you have all of the information inside of you already ... just give yourself some space to see it in writing. However, if you want some ideas for ways to start journaling, check out some fun tips to get those brain waves flowin'.
3. Practice opposite action.
I recently learned of the concept of opposite action, which is a skill from Dialectical Behavioral Therapy.
The idea behind opposite action is essentially to do the opposite of whatever our natural instinct is in stressful situations. This is an oversimplification, for sure, but the idea is to take a healthier, care-oriented route when faced with negative emotions.
For example, let's say today is a particularly low day. You know those days? Sometimes you just wake up and feel like "WTF" is an emotional state of being, because, like, WTF is going on with my mood?! During those days, many of us will want to just stay in bed, throw the covers over our head, and go back to sleep.
The instinct to hide away and sleep is a protective one. It's our body's way of saying, "Okay, you're not doing well, let me try to put a pause on this." The thing is, even though our body is trying to protect us, sleeping all day isn't going to help us out of a depressive episode.
So, in such instances, practicing opposite action can be a really powerful move. It can also feel like the hardest thing to do, and so if it isn't always possible to achieve, treat yourself with compassion and understanding. This is a practice, and that means it isn't a one-time thing with a 100% success rate.
In the case of waking up with a WTF-level depressed mood, here are some alternatives to staying in bed:
Move to the couch. Leaving the bedroom is sometimes the hardest part. Sit somewhere else, and begin to do some light stretches. If you don't feel like doing that, just notice yourself sitting on the couch. Where are you holding tension? How is your breathing?
Start your own dance party. I swear by this one. If you have it in you to blast some tunes and start shaking it out, I can almost promise that you'll feel some changes in your mood. It feels great to dance all silly and without grace. Just moving to the music the way you want is pretty liberating.
Listen to a podcast. This is a nice balance of relaxation and gentle intellectual stimulation. By focusing on the podcast, we are redirecting our attention to the present moment and away from negative self-talk.
Go for a walk! This one is always a game changer for me. Keep reading below to dive a bit more into the importance of going outside.
4. Practice radical acceptance.
I have a love/hate relationship with this one. Similar to opposite action, radical acceptance is also an important tenet of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT). My love/hate mentality toward radical acceptance is because I love when I practice it, but it's really hard for me to practice!
Radical acceptance is the practice of accepting a situation or the circumstances you are facing, as opposed to fighting back against them. As an example: say you woke up this morning 45 minutes late, because your phone died, thanks to a power outage. The alarm clock you have as a backup didn't go off ... because of the outage. You spilled roughly 30% of your coffee on your pants as you rushed out the door, and then you got in your car and realized the gas tank is on EMPTY ... need I continue?
Sometimes we just have those days - the days where you literally yell in your car, "Is this a joke?!" For me, it is super difficult to not take the unlucky string of events as a personal offense. However, this is where radical acceptance can be a game changer.
Instead of questioning why everything is very blah and uncool, perhaps try to accept it as very blah and uncool. Yes, today has been really sucky - okay, that is OKAY. Being able to accept the uncomfortable emotions we are feeling instead of trying to repress them or fix them is actually a great way to move through them.
The reality is, there is very little we can control in our day-to-day. As much as we wish to minimize the major coffee spills and alarm clock fiascos, they will probably happen from time to time. With bigger, more emotion-driven situations that involve loss, grief, and fear, practicing acceptance is really tough, but I find it to be very validating.
We may not be able to change the loss, grief, or fear, but at least we acknowledge it with open eyes. We aren't trying to stop it or fight it off. We are allowing ourselves to feel what we need to feel, accept what is, and do what we need to continue forward.
If you are interested in learning more about radical acceptance, I really enjoyed Tara Brach's book, "Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha."
5. Step outside.
There's something to be said for the wonders of a little fresh air. My whole day can turn around if I just step outside for ten or fifteen minutes and take some deep breaths. It's just beginning to feel like fall weather here in Upstate NY, and I am so excited to maximize my time outdoors over the next few months.
Research has shown that spending time outdoors can positively impact our overall well-being and health. Ideally, getting a consistent amount of time outdoors each week is beneficial, but even a few minutes could make a difference.
Spending time outside is a great resource to have in our toolkit when things start to get a little fuzzy. Whether you have been inside all day at work, or have been cooped up inside on a rainy day, stepping outside can be a natural reset. I recommend adding in just a few minutes of mindfulness as well. Practicing being present and observing the sensations around us are great ways to root ourselves in our bodies and reduce our anxiety levels.
It's the journey that counts.
We are all human, which means we will naturally have shifts in mood and perspective on the daily. Some days will feel like a breeze, others will feel like a great deal of effort. No matter what, trying to prioritize our well-being throughout the ups and downs is key. We are constantly on a journey, and it's the journey itself that matters, not so much the destination.
In order to enjoy the journey, I highly encourage you to fill your toolbox with whatever you need to find ease in moments of uncertainty. Perhaps one of the five ideas above will resonate with you. If not, take the time to learn what works for you. I am rooting for you and am cheering you on every step of the way.
Sending hugs,
Helana
